"I will never apologize again when I am in the wrong!"
There was a thread of comments by some stunned friends...
"Huh?"
"??? This doesn't sound like you."
"Sounds like you are ripe for politics."
"If you don't apologize then you will get a bad reputation with people."
My statement caused a good deal of head shaking, consternation, and questions.
Then I explained. In case you have one eyebrow raised in incredulity as to my meaning, I will explain it to you as well.
What does it mean to say, "I apologize."
Some years ago, I discovered that the words "apology" and "apologize" come from the Greek apologia.
Due to our modern use of these words, this root might be expected to mean to "to confess one's fault" or "say I'm sorry", but that is not the case.
Apologia means "to give a defense, a reasoned answer; to defend oneself"
This is why a Christian apologist is NOT saying "I believe in Christ...sorry about that."
Considering that the word means to "give an answer" to clear or justify one's self, beliefs, stance, or actions in a reasoned defense, why should a GUILTY person give an apology?
IF I AM IN THE WRONG, I should not apologize, but rather admit I am wrong, express my sorrow, and humbly ask for forgiveness. I keep the apologetics for when I defending my faith (or when I am giving a reason of why I don't use the words "I apologize" when confessing my being wrong).
Now some have said, "But that is not what the word apologize means today. Why do you bring this up?"
I completely understand what most people are talking about when they say that they apologize for doing wrong. I do not fault other people for using the word "apologize" to express their guilt and sorrow. I don't interrupt to correct them for their usage when they come to me, or grumble that they must not mean it because they used that word. That would be ridiculous.
I just choose to not use that word when I am confessing guilt, expressing regret and repenting. I like words, and words have meanings, and I desire to be consistent and careful as to the words I let out of my mouth.
But besides my own personal decision, why bring it out?
The root of the word means to give a reasoned defense, and therefore it is a great way to teach an important concept that is valuable to keep in mind:
It is all too easy to put a defense up (apologia) even while seeming to say I was wrong ("apologize").
I have noticed that when someone is saying that they were wrong to do something, often their "apology" does include excuses of why they did what they did (apologia). When someone comes out and issues an "apology" to say that what they did was wrong, but then in their confession tell why it was OK to do so, there is a problem.
When we are wrong, instead of explaining ourselves to try to justify what we did, is it not better to simply confess and forsake it?
Therefore I am just sharing that this is why I do not use the word "apology" or "apologize" when I am wrong, but rather follow this confession found in Scripture:
Psalm 38:18
"For I will declare mine iniquity; I will be sorry for my sin."
Thank you for letting me engage your thought. Aren't words wonderful?
Abortion must be abolished.
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